This week, I’ve found myself crushing on current Olympic swimming star, Ryan Lochte. Imagine my delight when I stumbled across a headline about Ryan Lochte’s sex life. Yeah, you know I clicked that.
Then it dawned on me; despite a (contested) habit of one-nighters, he doesn’t think Trivialization of Sex is attractive, whatsoever.
Here’s what we can glean:
“Women are evil.”
Lochte hates women. His idea of a perfect woman, does not exist in his reality. He is surrounded by females who are quick to jump into bed with him and, presumably, anyone else with a Greek God-of-a-bod and a pocket full of change. How could he ever trust a woman like that…to bear his children?
Poor guy, he almost sounds hopeless, saying his love-life is “in shambles.”
Modern society has given us a world where, for the first time in history, women can treat sex like its No Big Deal. (Males are naturals at this.) Not only can we detect exactly when we’re ovulating, we’ve got an abundant supply of contraception at our fingertips. There has probably never been a creature on Earth who has been able to cast aside their evolutionary role with such ease.
Males seem to detest women who readily give it up. Or they consider women only as worthless, disposable objects. (Because, who wants to spend his energy siring offspring that may or may not be his?!)
For better or worse, each step by the Feminist Movement, impinges upon male social dominance. When they find themselves buried in resent, being progressively disempowered; the backlash is frightful.
The resistance of women’s (sexual) independence is not isolated in our country. A wave of vicious acid attacks has been sweeping across the Eastern Hemisphere…
In Columbia, a current spike in these attacks has women’s rights advocates sounding worldwide calls of alarm:
‘“Sometimes in the West we make fast judgments and say, ‘Look how terrible they treat women in the East,’ and we don’t look first at ourselves,” said Monica Roa, the Bogota-based international programs director of Women’s Link Worldwide, a rights group. “The violence here may be different, but it emanates from the same place. This is a culture where machismo reigns, where men do what they want to do.”’
In Columbia, the attackers are usually jealous lovers, but a woman might also be splashed with acid by an angry stranger. The damage includes permanent disfigurement of the face (sometimes losing eyes or eyelids, lips, nose and/or teeth) paired with a lifetime of psychological trauma I can only imagine…
One victim recalled her attacker saying, “this is so you don’t think you’re so pretty.”
If the West has chosen to promote promiscuity (via popular culture) while the East, violently attempts to stifle women’s sexual independence, almost entirely… how might these issues be related?
Lets take a stab.
The Gatekeeper Phenomenon has enough material for an entire book, but we can start here. I usually begin with the question, “Why is women’s happiness on the decline?” (It’s been going down since the 50’s.) But now I realize, men are suffering too.
Resent, distrust and hate can eat you from the inside.
One of my good male friends is recovering from a tough divorce. His wife cheated on him for several years. He told me, when he needed to get cheered up, I was the first one he called. Sometimes it was an ordeal, coping with his belligerent attitude towards women, but I invited him to join my kickball team and took the time to put him in his place, when it came down to it.
In the beginning, I got a little irritated because he never believed the details of my stories. Not a fan of repeating points, I almost wanted to thump him for asking the same questions again and again. Like my answers were going to change?
I couldn’t get mad; he was damaged. There appears to be a pattern, in our society, of men affected by the same social disease. Maybe even Lochte. And it’s a trap, because any Lady who is healthy and whole is not looking to “hook up” with someone who needs to be rescued.
And she won’t be giving it up to her ideal choice for a man in a One Night Stand.
Trivialization of Sex is a trend that has appeared in the blink-of-an-evolutionary-eye. Cheap, accessible & safe contraception was certainly not a matter of our ancestors’ social repertoire. We have, pre-historically, been animals where the female must chose her mates carefully: the finest, the fittest, one who will provide. We are gene-screening machines.
Is it wise to cast this role aside?