Freak in the Mirror

Skull Image

This week’s adventure was a trip within. My own skin! Who is that freak in the mirror?

Bone Graft Surgery was Tuesday. Scheduled for 3pm, was able to eat and drink until 6am that morning. Great! Allowed for plenty of celebration the night before, at Monday Funday.

Arriving at the hospital, was an hour before anyone told us anything. Another hour passed. The IV was pumping something into my arm, no other sign of action. Doc was running behind, got bumped to 5:30. Decided Mom and Violet might as well go home. To escape the hunger pangs, snoozed. Woke to a man in scrubs.

Rather bleary, smiled and said, “Hi Brian.”

The man looked confused, “Who’s Brian?”

“He’s my anesthesiologist. Sorry, was expecting him.”

“I’m Dr. Lee. I work with Dr. Potter. Do you have a casual relationship with your anesthesiologist?”

Thinking back to our phone conversation the day before, we’d had lots of good laughs. Felt like we were buds!

WP_20140827_19_56_05_ProWhen Brian – ahem – Dr. Brian asked if I had any pre-existing conditions, said, “Yeah, my quads are SUPER SORE! Just got done with Hood to Coast.”

“Really? I used to do Hood to Coast. I was on a team of superheroes.”

“Oh I know the superheroes – I love those guys! They’re in my Hood to Coast episode from last year…”

So of course, told him about Audreality.

Dr. Lee didn’t know I had a rapport with the anesthesiologist (who I was already assuming handsome). Didn’t bother to explain it.

“Sorry, just had a dream where we were friends already.”

Awkward, at least it was brief. Soon Dr. Brian arrived (indeed, pretty cute). Everything was better. He explained what was going to happen, then wheeled me to the operating station.

Dr. Potter swept into the room. The Elusive One, one of a few doctors who won’t speak to family of the patient in person (only on the phone). Could smell his cologne. A touch on my right shoulder and slight nod was his only hello.

Dr. Potter shuffled away. Dr. Brian replaced him, gave me oxygen and something in the IV that would have me asleep in less than a minute.

Dr. Brian said, “Go ahead and imagine yourself in that vacation spot we talked about.”

Had to think fast! How about kickball? Nah, someplace more exotic. But where…? Aaaaaand I was out.

In a flash, awake again. Hurty, but not too bad! Pain hovering at level 2, they gave me a cocktail of medication, some thru the IV, others in pill form: antibiotic and a variety of painkillers. Spent the night at the hospital, nurses checking vitals and giving more meds every 2-3 hours. Around 7am, Dr. Lee woke me up and said I was free to go.

What he should have said was, “We are going to begin the discharge process, which will take up to 3 hours.”

WP_20140828_08_31_48_ProBecause I didn’t know! Summoned Mom for a ride, got dressed, packed my things. Was ready, SO READY TO GO.

When a lady came to take breakfast orders at 7:15, I asked, “What time would it be here?”

She said, “Not long, should arrive by 7:45.”

“Oh no thank you. By then I’ll be home.”

By ten or eleven (finally in my own bed), my strategy was: Sleep as much as possible. They warned there would be swelling. They didn’t say my face would balloon! Thursday, woke to a VERY puffy face, complete with a nice shiner on one side.

In a cartoonish way, sorta cute!

Paged Dr. Potter. Within a few minutes, he called. Said it’s normal.

“Is it going to get worse?”

“A little. You’ll look a pumpkin tomorrow.”

“Are my eyes going to swell shut completely?”

“They might.”

Sure enough, Friday morning, my eyes were only little slits in my big fat pumpkin face. Not cool. Except in hindsight! Which is why, can’t resist sharing this with you.

In case you don’t know what happened, that story is here.

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4 thoughts on “Freak in the Mirror

  1. You still look beautiful through all of that pain. It’s amazing how much of a positive spirit you maintain in the face of such great pain. I would be a crying, depressed baby! Lol

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