When Someone Grabs You in the Hoo-Ha

The Trump Tapes put an especially bad taste in my mouth. Kinda feels like I’m going to barf as I type this. That tang, that surge of saliva… Ahem. Oh yes. Was about to tell the story about the first time I encountered the now-infamous Crotch-Grab Maneuver.

It happened while visiting a friend in NYC. She’d recently moved there to be a model. She was staying in one of those apartments where a bunch of starving young waifs live rent-free, while they try to get established. Most of us have seen a glamorized version of this on TV. Couldn’t help wanting to see what it was like in real life.

The people who ran this particular apartment were a couple of dudes with a promo company. Turns out, one of the things these ladies signed up for, in exchange for free rent, is regular attendance at all the clubs these guys promoted, never any other clubs. They were forbidden from speaking with other promoters, and weren’t allowed to break away from the group when they were out. This happened most nights, until the wee hours. Sometimes models went home with the clients.

9-2016-1-4My friend thought one of the dudes in charge had a crush on me. Happened to be wearing my blue velvet leggings that night – my magic pants.

She said, “He was looking at your butt in those pants. And he said you were sexy. He never does that. He’s not easily impressed.”

Certain I knew why, “It’s totally the magic pants.”

The next time we saw him, it was the whole gang from the apartment at another club, SL. Our table had a bottle of champagne that was four feet tall. That’s when CGM happened. Below is my initial reaction (stunned), originally posted on my blog, years ago:

Wow. Not sure what you’d call it when a person grabs you in such a way. Flirting? Sexual assault? Maybe it’s his way of saying hello.

“That’s the guy who has a crush on you,” whispered my friend.

“No kidding. He just grabbed my vagina.”

That was my cue to exit. Dodged a couple more crotch-grabbing attempts on my way out the door.

This is the exact behavior Donald Trump was bragging about in Friday’s stomach-turning revelation. Victimizers pull these moves because they are in a position of power over women. Because they think/know they can get away with it. Perhaps they think women enjoy it somehow, since no one puts up a fight? Shouldn’t take a genius to see, the victims likely tolerate the abuse because they’re afraid. Something of value is on the line. That apartment (and for that matter, the entire Miss Universe Pageant, apparently) was a sexual predator trap.

It was a loud, crowded club and this dude acted like he owned the place, along with all the women in it. What would have been the “correct” response in that situation? Say something? Have him thrown out? I was probably entitled to some form of self-defense, but I’ve never been violent. My overwhelming impulse at that moment was GET THE FUCK OUTTA THERE. So that’s what I did. Never saw him again.

It’s sick – their breed is not a rare kind. And it’s a damn shame someone so deranged is THIS CLOSE to being President.

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